HIS PARENTS
“Even though you may have had a very good relationship with his parents, in a break up or divorce situation they will probably side with their child,” says family psychologist Cezzanne Norman-Hoffman. However, it is not uncommon that after a divorce or break-up you remain steady friends with your former parents-in-law. “If you do decide to keep the friendship it is important to define yourself as an individual and not as part of a couple,” she says.
Do Establish a friendship that is based on your individual shared qualities and interests and enjoy the friendship without the shadow of your broken relationship.
Do It’s inevitable that you’ll find yourself face to face with your ex at some point (and possibly his new partner), if you’ve stayed friends with his parents. Anticipate and prepare for this eventuality, and deal with emotions and possible unresolved issues this may bring about. Ask friends, family and even possibly a therapist to assist you in working through these issues.
Don’t be tempted to discuss your ex’s negative qualities and behaviour and don’t obsess about his new partner or what they may be doing.
Don’t Disregard your new partner’s feelings and opinions in your friendship with your former parents-in-law. Encourage your former parents-in-law to acknowledge the new man in your life and to include him in the friendship.
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