Finding your state of complete inner stillness can be a difficult task. Use these few tips to learn the basics of meditation.
CALM YOUR MIND
Many women battle to clear their heads during a meditation session. “My mind just races, filling up with thoughts of what I need to do when I get back to the office, or about my kids’ latest school reports — it never stops!” says 32-year-old reader Marilize van der Westhuizen.
It may help to try a few relaxation exercises before you meditate, to allow your mind to slow down and prepare to be still. In his book How to Meditate (Crystal Clarity Publishers), John Novak suggests deep yogic breaths:
s Stand upright, arms at sides.
d Relax your body and centre your consciousness in your spine. Become aware of your breath and breathe deeply from your diaphragm.
h Slowly bend at your waist, keeping legs and spine straight. Exhale slowly but completely.
m Let your body lower as far as it is comfortable. Pause for a few seconds in this position.
s Now inhale slowly as you lift your torso, expanding first your diaphragm, then the sides of your ribcage and finally your upper chest. Lift arms to shoulder height, elbows pointing out.
p With the incoming breaths, draw in energy to every cell.
Continue breathing deeply and lifting your torso — stretching your hands above your head.
s Repeat three or four times until you feel relaxed and ready to meditate.
“It is important to make a strong mental resolution to put aside all preoccupations with this world,” says Novak. He adds that we’re so frantic and restless that to allow our bodies to relax and our minds to be still may feel abnormal.
Physiotherapist and meditation teacher Sue Fuller-Good suggests trying a meditation class. “A group energy can help you to focus much more easily. Meditation is a fitness you need to train for, it takes time, practice and discipline to master it, so don’t expect to do it perfectly the first time you try.”
CONTROL YOUR INNER FIDGET
Get comfortable before you start. Sit in a chair or on the floor, with a straight spine, in a quiet, private space. Focus on your breathing, letting it become gentle and light. After some time, move your attention to the feelings in your body.
If you feel discomfort, peace or pleasure, bring your attention here, but remain still, suggests Naomi Ozaniec, author of Teach Yourself Meditation (Teach Yourself). Instead of trying to fight the feelings, you’re learning to accept them.
“If you find that even once you are relaxed you still feel inclined to fidget, spend a few weeks just breathing for five or 10 minutes a day to train yourself before going further,” says Fuller-Good.
“What really matters is not just the practice of sitting, but the state of mind you find yourself in after meditation,” says Sogyal Rinpoche in How to Meditate: An Illustrated Guide to Calming the Mind and Relaxing the Body by Paul Roland (Ulysses Press).
FIND MINDFULNESS
If mindfulness seems to be an elusive and impossible state, remember that the aim of meditation is simply to make you live in the present moment with all of your focus.
Mindfulness is learning to be awake to life at every moment. When you tune in to each breath in a state of calm as you meditate, savour every bite as you eat, notice every expression and listen to every word your partner says with your full attention, you teach yourself mindfulness.
Writing a mental shopping list while playing with your kids, or running through your presentation for the next day while listening to a friend is the opposite. Be in the moment, every moment.
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