While trying to strike a balance between a modern and traditional lifestyle, young black women are changing the way they perceive their body image says Ntombi Sogoni.
Dikatso Mametse (28), a senior communications adviser, is one of many black women who straddle two lifestyles. On one side there’s the ambitious career women, who leads a fast-paced lifestyle while trying to keep fit and eat healthy. And on the other, the respectful young woman who goes home regularly to visit her more traditional parents where healthy eating habits and regular exercise are not necessarily high on the list of priorities. ‘I try to get my folks to make healthier choices like buying Nando’s rather than KFC when it comes to takeaways,’ says Dikatso.
‘Growing up, I was spanked if I didn’t finish every last bit of food on my plate,’ says Mmabatho Brown (29), a director of corporate services and avid blogger. ‘My mom dished up for us so it wouldn’t matter if I was hungry or not. I would force every morsel into my mouth to avoid being punished. Most black children were raised this way and now I find myself doing the same thing to my own kids.’
Such is the legacy of many black women who grew up in the 80s: city girls trying to marry the modern and traditional lifestyle. Traditionally, African women have been less preoccupied with diet and exercise to get thin than their Western counterparts. Keeping slim and exercising was not the main focus in black communities. But in recent years a growing number of black women are rejecting the notion that African women are supposed to prize wide hips and big behinds, becoming more body conscious and making healthier choices. Still, changing the mindsets of the older generation and balancing the two worlds is a constant challenge.
The shadow of HIV
The possibility that people might think you or child had HIV/Aids had many moms making sure their children were well fed. And even today in some communities, a skinny child or one who suddenly starts losing weight is suspected of having the ‘dreaded disease’. A heavier woman was viewed as fertile, healthy, beautiful and wealthy.
The advertising industry, magazines and television have played an important role in shaping and informing women across all races about body image. Gradually black women are redefining what it means to be beautiful and for them it’s not about chasing the perfect body but rather that if you live good you’ll feel and look good.
Process engineer Katlego Tshehlo (27) who describes herself a well-proportioned figure eight says, ‘For a long time we have been made to believe that it is our heritage to carry big bodies and if you’re not overweight, you’re not a true reflection of Africa. Health was not a focal point for our grandmothers and mothers who are overweight, some even immobile because they can’t carry their weight and others suffering from various ailments such as high blood pressure and cholesterol.’
What the experts say
Registered dietician Janene Sacks says. ‘Most black women come to me because they want to lose weight but only a few come for health issues, which is unfortunate because as a race they are high risk candidates for high blood pressure and cholesterol due to poor diet. When we discuss diet and work out eating and exercise plans, I’m usually the one who addresses the health issues.’
Beauty editor Zanele Kumalo, says, ‘Our perception of body image has changed over the years resulting in more of us wanting to look good and be able to wear clothes that are in fashion – skinny jeans, leggings and short shorts – with confidence. Black women are big because we eat the wrong things. We eat too much starchy food and in large portions.’
Reaction to change
Katlego says there are those who unfortunately hide behind being black when they don’t drop the weight and see results as quickly as they’d like. And Mmabatho agrees, ‘Our parents’ generation likes to say we must not get too skinny because as black women our behinds are supposed to be heavy. But most women in our generation know it’s no excuse. It’s not just about looking thin but also about being healthy.’
Mmabatho says the want and need for change for herself happened gradually. ‘I started noticing as I was gaining more weight that my friends were much smaller than I was. The moment that made me decide to make a change was at my birthday party last year, seeing photographs of myself in the local newspaper. I literally could not recognise myself. It felt like I had lost myself.’
The mother of two children aged one and four says she has struggled with her weight since she became a young adult and even more so after having children. She says when she decided to lose weight and change her lifestyle she had mixed reactions depending on who she spoke to. Her husband was shocked and told her he preferred the full-figured Mmabatho even though she was much bigger than when they’d first met. But after some convincing, he now supports and encourages her and both have taken up spinning classes over the weekend. Her peers who had watched her grow up told her she’d let herself go and warned that she would lose my husband if she didn’t do something about her weight. And the older generation said ‘black women have become too Westernised’. ‘Whether this is the case or not, there’s no denying that being too big is the cause of many of the diseases that we suffer from today. Not all of us are striving for a zero-size figure. We just have learnt to appreciate that it is important to exercise and eat correctly to maintain a healthy lifestyle.’
In a society where women are constantly bombarded with images of zero-sized models, black women have often questioned where they fit in on the beauty scale. Being large was considered a sign of fertility, wealth and the picture of health. But slowly, black women are starting to accept that they don’t need to fill either of the extreme stereotypes. It’s a healthy lifestyle – regular exercise and a well-balanced diet – that will lead to a healthy body image, longevity and both mental and emotional happiness. ‘It’s all about self appreciation and feeling good about the way we present ourselves,’ says Katlego.
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